My Journey, Your Roadmap
You are a whole person — not a problem to be fixed.
I work with ambitious women in their 20s & 30s who've done the awareness work and are now in the messy middle: they see the perfectionistic people-pleasing pattern they’re in, but they don't yet know what their own life looks like without that label.
On the outside, things may look easy and confident.
On the inside, you often feel shame and exhausted.
I’m not here to fix you, because you were never broken. I’m not here to make you into a new version of yourself, but to help you reconnect with the woman that’s already there, and build a life that finally reflects her.
Our work together focuses on:
Uncovering your actual values, the ones that are genuinely yours rather than inherited or forced, so every decision starts from a place of self-trust instead of self-doubt
Rebuilding your identity from the inside out by moving away from who everyone expected you to be and toward a version of yourself you actually recognize
Turning awareness into action by moving away from “all-or-nothing” perfectionism and toward more balance and alignment to make your values livable every day
I’m here to help you stop living for approval and start living for you.
Finding the woman I thought I’d lost — and helping you find her, too.
Why I do this work & what I bring to it
I spent a decade in corporate HR watching brilliant, ambitious women shrink to fit into boxes they didn't build for themselves. I saw the over-preparation, the Sunday scaries, and the quiet shame of doing something “right” yet feeling entirely wrong.
I recognized it because I was doing it too — living a perfect life on paper while privately navigating the reconstruction of my identity after a severe eating disorder fueled by perfectionism.
As I became aware of my own Approval Loop and began to rebuild myself, I learned that peace doesn’t come from being better at saying “no” to others — it comes from saying “yes” to yourself.
My approach is scientifically informed, compassionate, and rooted in one core belief: sustainable change comes from building self-trust, not from enforcing stricter rules or harsher standards.
Since 2025 I’ve worked within a wellness coaching company supporting corporate leaders and a mental health coaching company supporting kids, teens, and young adults, gaining experience across a wide range of challenges including anxiety, ADHD, disordered eating, self-esteem, relationship dynamics, and identity questions with clients ages 6-55. But what I’ve come to value most is helping high-achieving women in their 20s and 30s break approval-seeking patterns, reconnect with their own voice, and build lives that reflect who they actually are, not just who they’ve learned to be for others.
This is the work I’ve done in my own life, supported by the registered dietitians, therapists, and mindset coaches who helped me find my own way back.
I know what it feels like to rebuild from the inside out. And I know how to help you do the same.
If you’re ready to stop living for approval and start building a life that feels like yours, let’s talk.
NBHWC Certified Health & Wellness Coach • ICF Certified Life Coach • 10+ Year Corporate HR Veteran
“Clarity coaching was a transformative experience and Valerie created a space for me to reflect, learn, and forgive myself without judgment.”
- Olivia
You’ve already done the hard part — recognizing your people-pleasing tendencies.
Now comes the part almost no one talks about: figuring out where to go next.
Most women who find me have already tried to change the pattern. They've set the boundary. They've said no. They've read the books. And they're still waiting to feel like themselves.
That's not a failure. That's exactly where the real work begins.
I help you leave behind:
✘ Making decisions based on what others will think instead of what you want
✘ The spiral of guilt that follows every boundary you try to hold
✘ Carrying everyone else's emotions as if it’s your responsibility
✘ The quiet but exhausting grief of a life that looks right but doesn’t feel like yours
✘ Living as a version of yourself that was built for someone else's needs
So you can step into:
✓Making decisions based on your own values instead of to gain others’ approval
✓Knowing what you want clearly enough to ask for it, choose it, and protect it
✓Relationships where you show up as yourself, not as whoever they need you to be
✓A voice that’s genuinely yours, not selective based on what feels safe to say
✓A life built for you, by you
This is the work that changes everything. And you’re closer than you think.
“I am much happier and more content than I ever thought possible.”
- Kate